Life and Mary Ann Page 7

  ‘Yes, Mrs Schofield. She was going to come last night, and she didn’t, and I couldn’t get through. I tried several times.’

  ‘No, you wouldn’t. The line’s broken.’ She didn’t go on to explain how the line was broken, but added, ‘Janice is upstairs.’

  Before Mary Ann could make any reply to this, Tony brought out in an amazed tone, ‘Upstairs! And all this going on?’

  Mrs Schofield did not answer Tony, but, turning to Mary Ann, asked, ‘Would you like to go up to her, Mary Ann? It’s the second door at the top of the landing, on the right-hand side.’

  ‘Yes. Yes, Mrs Schofield.’ Mary Ann glanced towards Tony, but Tony was looking at Mrs Schofield.

  Out in the hall she stood for a moment gazing about her.

  The house inside was clean, tidy and clean, not bright like their house was bright, but not dirty. She did not go immediately up the stairs, for she was overwhelmed with pity not untouched with shock. She had just experienced the first great surprise of her life. She had been shown in one swift swoop the meaning of…putting a face on it. Mrs Schofield must have spent all her married life putting a face on it. She could see her now on the night of Len’s wedding, standing on the platform playing the trombone when she could stop herself laughing. And later that night she would have gone home to perhaps a similar scene to that which had just taken place…Eeh, it was awful! Poor Mrs Schofield. She went slowly up the stairs and knocked on the second door to the right. And when it was opened, Janice said, ‘Oh, you.’ Then looking past her and towards the stairs, she asked, ‘How long have you been here?’

  ‘Not very long. I tried to phone you, but couldn’t get through. I thought something was wrong when you didn’t come last night, after saying you would.’

  Janice turned her back completely on Mary Ann and walked back into the bedroom; then after she had sat down on the side of the bed, she said, ‘Well, come in, don’t stand there.’

  Mary Ann went into the room, closing the door behind her. She felt rather gauche in Janice’s presence, and very, very young. Janice was sitting with her hands nipped between her knees, and she looked at her hands as she asked, ‘Did you hear anything going on?’

  ‘Yes, we did.’

  ‘We?’ Janice’s head came up.

  ‘Tony’s with me.’

  ‘Oh my God!’ Although Janice said this in a very swanky tone, it sounded much more of a blasphemy than if, say, Mrs McBride had said it.

  ‘Well, he would get an earful.’

  ‘I think you should come down. Your mother’s lip’s all swollen.’

  Janice looked down at her hands once more and began to rock herself, before she said, ‘Oh, it won’t be the first time. And anyway, she asks for it.’

  ‘Asks for it?’ Mary Ann’s voice was high and sharp. ‘She’s nice. I’ve always said that.’

  ‘If that’s the kind of niceness you want, yes. But she’s always got on his nerves. She should never have married him. She should have taken someone polished, and re-feened. Someone who liked to go to concerts, yet someone who would laugh at her jokes when she was being funny ha-ha. But most of all somebody who would keep up this damn mausoleum.’ She released her hands from between her knees and flung them sidewards. ‘Oh, she gets on my goat too.’

  ‘But he hit her, Janice…twice!’

  ‘He was drunk and worried about me.’

  ‘About you?’

  ‘Yes. It all came out last night. That is what I wanted to see you about. I was in a blue funk yesterday, but now all the beans are spilt it doesn’t matter…I’m going to have a baby.’

  Mary Ann’s mouth dropped into a large ‘O’, before she brought her lips together again, saying, ‘Janice!’

  ‘Oh! For God’s sake, don’t look like that, Mary Ann. You look like the Virgin Mary, only more damned good.’

  Although Janice had attended the Convent she wasn’t a Catholic, and Mary Ann had always resented her digs at the Virgin Mary. But now all she could say was, ‘Are you…are you married?’

  ‘Oh, be your age…Why I thought of coming to see you I don’t know. Of course I’m not married. What do you think all this hoo-ha is about? And I’m telling you, I don’t care much if I do or I don’t. But Father’s going to play the gigantic square and make him do…the right thing. Oh my God!’ Janice jerked herself from the bed. ‘The right thing! And live a life like theirs! I wouldn’t have believed it, but Daddy’s taken it worse than she has. You get surprises if you’ve got anything left to feel surprise with. She didn’t blink an eyelid, yet Daddy, he nearly went through the roof. And him running one in Newcastle and another in Pelaw.’

  It must have been Mary Ann’s puckered expression that made Janice close her eyes and fling her head back as she cried defiantly, by way of exclamation, ‘A woman…he’s always had a woman, but now he’s got two.’

  Mary Ann knew that she should sit down. She had a frightened feeling. It was like the time she had thought that Mr Quinton wanted her mother. She wasn’t as green as Janice thought she was. It wasn’t Janice’s knowledge that was shocking her, but the open flaunting of it. She herself would rather have died than talk like this about her parents. Then Janice surprised her still further by turning on the bed and flinging herself face downwards.

  ‘Oh, don’t, Janice, don’t.’ Mary Ann grasped Janice’s hand which was pounding into the pillow, and when she began to cry with a hard, tearing sound, Mary Ann knelt on the floor and put her arms around her and her face on the pillow as she murmured over and over, ‘Oh, don’t, Janice, don’t. Don’t cry, don’t cry so.’

  When Janice finally stopped crying she seemed to have washed away the hard covering of her personality, for, sitting once again on the side of the bed, one hand only now nipped between her knees, she looked at Mary Ann and said quietly, ‘I won’t have a life like theirs, I’d rather take something and finish it.’

  ‘Oh, Janice! Don’t say such things, don’t. And you needn’t have a life like theirs…Is…is this boy nice?’

  ‘No. No, he’s not. He’s as far removed from me as Daddy is from…from her.’ Janice now turned her head to the side and said, ‘I’ve got a lot of my father in me so that’s why I know that if I marry Freddie I won’t be able to stick it. I think that’s why I grew to dislike her…my mother. Because she had the power to stick it. To put a face on it. She should have left him years ago. And she might have, too, if it hadn’t been for Grandpa. He died only three years ago. They were both barmy about this house and garden. There’s something to be said on both sides, because it was Daddy’s money that was keeping it going. That is until he turned nasty…and he can be nasty, hellish. He cut out the gardener, and the maids…and, oh…oh, lots of things. And the more things he did the more face she put on, and that drove him almost round the bend…But I won’t marry Freddie, I won’t.’

  ‘He can’t make you if you don’t want to.’ Mary Ann was holding Janice’s hands tightly between hers now. ‘Look, come and stay with us for a while.’

  Janice turned and stared into Mary Ann’s face. ‘Would your mother let me?’

  ‘Yes. Yes, of course she would.’ Mary Ann hadn’t stopped to consider whether Lizzie would fall in with this arrangement or not. She only knew she wanted to help Janice.

  ‘I’d be glad to get away from here. If only for a few days. But I’m beginning to show…and there’s, there’s your Michael!’

  Yes, there was Michael, and Sarah. But Mary Ann, overriding this as well, said casually, ‘What does it matter? They’re not to know.’

  ‘Oh, they’ll know. Everybody will know shortly. It would be better in the long run, I suppose, to do what I’m told.’

  ‘Does he…Freddie, want…want to get married?’

  ‘Oh, yes. He would jump in feet first at the idea. He’s only in the dock office and he’ll know when he’s on a good thing; Daddy would set him up. Oh, I know exactly what’ll happen. He’ll set him up, and he’ll buy us a house and a car. He’s rotten with money, and he�
��ll spend it on anything or anybody outside this house.’

  The bitterness was creeping back into Janice’s tone, and Mary Ann shook her hand and said, ‘Well, wait and see. And think about coming to us. You needn’t worry about phoning or anything, just come. My mother will love to have you.’

  Janice, now looking down into Mary Ann’s upturned face, smiled and said, ‘You’re sweet, you know, Mary Ann. I used to be jealous of you and Beatrice being close pals. I always wanted you for a friend, a complete friend. Because you were different somehow. I suppose it was because you had nothing in your family life to hide.’

  ‘O…oh!’ Mary Ann’s head went back on a little laugh now. ‘Oh, Janice, you don’t know the half of it. I’m beginning to think we all have something to hide. I’ve been fighting for me da since…oh, I can’t remember the time when I wasn’t putting him over as somebody wonderful; when I wasn’t covering up his drinking bouts. It isn’t like that now, but things still happen and I always seem to be covering up for him. You do things like that when you love someone…Nothing to hide! Do you know, I’ve always envied you.’

  ‘Envied me? God! Envied me? The times I’ve been going to run away, or commit suicide; or throw myself over the banisters to stop them havin’ a row…Envy me!’

  The two girls sat looking at each other on the side of the bed. And their hands held tightly for a moment, before Mary Ann said through a break in her voice, ‘I’d better be going down now, Janice; Tony will want to be getting away. But remember what I said. Come any time…any time. Goodbye, now.’

  ‘Goodbye, Mary Ann, and thanks. But I’ll let you know if I’m coming. I’ll drop you a line, or phone. Goodbye. I feel better now. Goodbye.’

  In the drawing room Tony was no longer sitting on the couch but on a chair some distance from Mrs Schofield, and as Mary Ann entered the room it did not seem as if she had interrupted their talking, it was as if they had been sitting quiet for some time. She stood in front of Mrs Schofield when she said, ‘I’ve asked Janice to come and stay with us for a while, Mrs Schofield.’

  ‘That’s nice of you, Mary Ann. But hadn’t you better ask your mother first?’

  ‘Oh, my mother won’t mind…she won’t.’

  Mrs Schofield did not speak, she only moved her head slightly. And then Mary Ann added, ‘I’ll have to be going now.’ She turned sharply and looked towards Tony, and he rose from the chair but made no comment.

  Mrs Schofield, too, rose to her feet, but she did not accompany them from the room, and Mary Ann was slightly puzzled when Tony took leave of her with just a single goodbye; a rather curt-sounding goodbye.

  As the car went through the tunnel of the drive, Mary Ann said softly, ‘It’s awful, awful.’

  Tony made no response to this. He slowed the car up as he neared the end of the drive, then, when he had swung into the main road, he quickly changed gears and they went roaring towards the city.

  Mary Ann realised that Tony was quiet because, like her, he was upset. He, too, must have seen Mrs Schofield as a gay creature. And she supposed that men could be shocked as much about such things as women could. She said now, as if they were continuing a conversation, ‘I hope she doesn’t marry that Freddie.’

  ‘Who? Who are you talking about?’

  ‘Janice.’

  ‘Is she going to be married?’

  ‘Well.’ She glanced at him. Did he, or didn’t he know? She said softly, ‘Well, you know she’s going to have a baby.’

  ‘Good God!’ The car almost jerked to a stop, then went on again. ‘So that’s it.’ He was not speaking to her but answering some question of his own. She did not take it up for he did not look in the mood to talk. He looked like her da did at times, but more so like Mr Lord when he was very angry inside. So they didn’t speak again until they reached the farmyard. And there he turned the car before stopping. Then reaching over to open the door for her, he said, ‘Are you going to tell your mother?’

  ‘Yes.’ Mary Ann hesitated. ‘I’ll have to if Janice is coming.’

  ‘Yes.’ He nodded his head without looking at her, and said again, ‘Yes.’

  She closed the car door, then watched him speeding back along the road down which they had just come.

  Mike had been going in the direction of the byres, and he turned on the sound of the car leaving the yard again and, coming to her, said, ‘My! You’re soon back. Where’s he gone?’

  Mary Ann, looking up at Mike, meant to say ‘I don’t know,’ but instead she bowed her head and burst out crying.

  ‘What’s the matter? What’s happened?’ Mike’s voice was deep.

  ‘Nothing. Nothing.’

  ‘Tony said somethin’ to you?’

  ‘Oh, no, no. Come in a minute, will you? I’ve…I’ve got to tell me ma.’

  In the kitchen, with Mike sitting at her side and Lizzie sitting in front of her, she held their silence with her story. And when it was finished she looked from one to the other, and they returned her gaze, still without speaking. Then Mike, getting up and walking to the pipe-rack, lifted a wire cleaner from the top of it and rammed it down the stem of his pipe before shaking his head and saying, ‘I think this is one of the biggest surprises of me life.’

  ‘Yes, that’s how I felt, Da. I couldn’t take it in.’

  ‘Poor soul! Look at her the night of the wedding. Who could have been more full of fun?’ Lizzie had forgotten her irritation towards Mrs Schofield on that particular night, and her sympathy at this moment was very genuine. ‘Did you actually see him hit her?’

  ‘Yes, Ma.’ Mary Ann reverted to the old form of address. At moments such as this Ma seemed more fitting, for the three of them were joined in their pity. ‘I didn’t see him do it the second time; I hid my face.’

  ‘You never know, do you?’ They both looked towards Mike as he went on pushing the cleaner down the stem of the pipe. ‘I would have staked me last shilling that she was the happiest woman alive. Mind you’—he wagged the pipe towards Lizzie—‘I’ve said, haven’t I, that she wasn’t as dizzy as she made out. I knew from the minute I first clapped eyes on her there was a depth there. But it never struck me that all this light fantastic was just a cover…did it you? Did you ever have an inkling?’

  ‘No. No. Like you, I would have sworn she was happy.’ Again Lizzie added, ‘Poor soul.’

  ‘You don’t mind me asking Janice here?’ Mary Ann now asked of Lizzie.

  ‘No, no. It will be better if she’s away from that set-up a time. But with a man like that, it looks as if he’ll get his own way, and make her marry the fellow. Which, I suppose, will be all for the best. At least best for the child…Oh, dear God, it’s awful, when you think of it. I’ve never liked Janice very much, but now I’m sorry to the heart for her. And it’s not a bit of wonder she’s gone wrong, not a bit.’

  ‘Oh, I’m not as sorry for her as I am for the mother.’ Mike put the pipe into his mouth. ‘That young ’un’s got a tough core, she’ll get by…But you see, don’t you, Liz, money isn’t everything.’ Mike now thrust out his arm and wagged his finger at Lizzie. It was as if money, and its value, had been under discussion, ‘Schofield’s rotten with money. I understand he’s got his fingers in all sorts of pies. Real estate, shipping, the lot. He’s as bad as the old man. And where’s his money got him? What has it done for him? Except help him to run three homes!’

  ‘Mike!’

  ‘Oh, don’t get on your high horse, Liz. She’s told us all about it, hasn’t she? It’s herself that’s told us.’ He flapped his hand towards Mary Ann. ‘Her education’s been advanced this afternoon. But as I was sayin’ about money…see what it does?’ Mike bounced his head once, then turning on his heel, went out, and Lizzie, sitting straight in her chair, remarked in hurt tones, ‘Why has he to go off the deep end like that? Who was talking about money?’ She looked at Mary Ann and shook her head. Mary Ann said nothing. She knew that her da had been pointing out to her ma that people who married for money were not always happy. And she
knew that her mother was being purposely blind to the parable.

  The sound of Michael coming in the back way at this moment brought Mary Ann to her feet, and she said hastily, ‘I’ll go upstairs and do my face. Don’t tell him about Janice, will you not? He doesn’t like her very much and if she’s comin’ here it will make things awkward.’

  ‘Go along. All right. Don’t worry.’

  Mary Ann had not reached the hall door when Michael entered from the scullery, and as he watched her disappearing back he remarked, in a brotherly fashion, ‘What’s up with her? Has she been crying? Why did they come back so quickly?’

  ‘Oh…Janice wasn’t very well.’

  ‘What’s she been crying for?’

  ‘She’s upset. Just a little upset about something.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Oh, Michael, don’t ask so many questions.’

  ‘Oh, all right, if it’s private. Only if I started to howl my eyes out, there’d be a reason for it.’

  Lizzie turned and looked at her son and smiled fondly at him as she said, ‘There would if you howled your eyes out; that would be the day, when you howled your eyes out.’

  Lizzie was to remember these words and to think, ‘Isn’t it strange the things we say? It’s as if we have a premonition of what’s going to happen.’ But at this moment she had no feeling of premonition. She just said to her son, ‘It’s time you were getting yourself changed as Sarah will be here and you not ready.’

  ‘Mother.’

  ‘Yes, what is it?’ Lizzie had gone to the sideboard and taken out the teacloth.

  ‘I want to ask you something.’

  She turned and glanced at him. ‘Well, I’m listening, go on.’

  ‘It’s about my holiday.’

  ‘Your holiday? It’s late in the year to start talking of holidays.’

  ‘Father owes me a week. He said I could have it at any time. You remember?’

  ‘Yes. But we’ll soon be on Christmas. And you don’t want your holiday with snow on the ground, surely?’